Managing the Holidays: Tips for Navigating Stress and Emotional Triggers

The holidays are often described as “the most wonderful time of the year.” But let’s be honest: for many people, that’s not the whole story. As a therapist—and as someone who’s had my own ups and downs during this season—I know how complicated the holidays can feel.

For some, it’s a time of joy and connection, but for others, it can bring up stress, loneliness, or painful memories. The expectations, family dynamics, and nonstop hustle can leave you feeling overwhelmed instead of fulfilled. If that resonates with you, I want you to know you’re not alone—and you don’t have to just endure the holidays. There are ways to make this season more manageable and meaningful.

Here are some of the strategies I’ve shared with my clients—and have used myself—to navigate this time of year with more intention and peace.

1. Let Go of Perfection

I’ll admit, I’ve fallen into the trap of trying to create a “perfect” holiday. But the more I chased perfection, the more it eluded me. Over time, I’ve learned to focus on what actually brings me joy rather than what I think the holidays should look like.

Ask yourself: What truly matters to you during this season? Is it spending time with people who lift you up? Finding a moment to pause and reflect? Whatever it is, let that be your guide—and give yourself permission to let the rest go.

2. Say “No” Without Guilt

I used to struggle with saying no during the holidays. I felt obligated to say yes to every invitation or request, even when it left me feeling exhausted. Now, I know that saying no isn’t selfish—it’s an act of self-care.

If you’re feeling stretched too thin, try saying something like, “Thank you so much for inviting me, but I can’t make it this time.” Setting boundaries isn’t easy, but it’s essential for your mental health—and trust me, it gets easier with practice.

3. Plan for Emotional Triggers

The holidays can stir up all kinds of emotions. Maybe it’s the memory of a loved one you’ve lost, tension with family members, or simply the pressure to be cheerful when you don’t feel that way.

I’ve found it helpful to anticipate those triggers and think about how I’ll respond. For instance, if a family gathering feels overwhelming, I’ll make an exit plan—like driving myself so I can leave when I need to. And if a certain tradition brings up grief, I remind myself it’s okay to feel sad. You don’t have to force yourself to “get over it.” Sometimes, just allowing yourself to feel what you’re feeling can bring relief.

4. Create Your Own Traditions

I’ve seen many clients struggle with traditions that no longer feel meaningful or bring up more stress than joy. If that’s the case for you, consider starting your own traditions.

One year, instead of a big family gathering, I spent Christmas Eve watching my favorite movies in pajamas. It was simple, but it brought me so much comfort. You don’t have to follow the same patterns if they don’t serve you anymore. This season can look however you want it to.

5. Prioritize Self-Care

It’s easy to let self-care fall by the wayside during the holidays. I’ve been guilty of skipping meals or staying up too late to get everything done. But I’ve learned that when I take even a few minutes to check in with myself—whether it’s a quiet walk, journaling, or deep breathing—it makes a big difference.

You don’t need to carve out hours for self-care. Small moments of mindfulness can help you stay grounded and recharge.

6. Focus on Connection, Not Obligations

The holidays aren’t about how many presents you give or how many events you attend. They’re about connection—whether that’s with others or with yourself.

One of the most meaningful holiday moments I’ve had was a simple phone call with a friend when I was feeling overwhelmed. It reminded me that connection doesn’t have to be elaborate to be powerful. Don’t underestimate the value of a heartfelt conversation or quiet time with someone you care about.

7. Reach Out for Support

If the holidays feel like too much to handle on your own, that’s okay. This season can amplify feelings of stress, anxiety, and grief, and you don’t have to navigate it alone.

I’ve seen how therapy can help people find clarity and balance during difficult times, and I’m here to support you if you need it. Whether you’re looking for tools to manage stress or just need a safe space to talk, therapy can make a difference—not just during the holidays, but year-round.

Making the Holidays Work for You

The holidays don’t have to look perfect, and they don’t have to look the same for everyone. Whether this season brings you joy, stress, or a mix of both, remember that it’s okay to set boundaries, honor your emotions, and redefine what the holidays mean for you.

Take care of yourself this season. You deserve peace, joy, and rest—whatever that looks like for you.

If you’re ready to explore how therapy can help you navigate the holidays or other challenges, I’d love to support you. Together, we can create tools to help you thrive, no matter what season you’re in.

By: Amber Bishop